Kinky Cartography; a State by State Breakdown of American Fetishes.

I always find maps as a way of presenting information fascinating, whether it’s looking at voter or consumer patterns, or at internet search demographics, so naturally when I came across this lovely bit of kink cartography my attention was well and truly garnered. Compiled by Dr. Evan Goldstein, this map breaks down each states’ most googled kink – revealing at last what goes on behind closed doors over the pond. And the results aren’t exactly what you’d have expected…

Weird and Wild; from Wisconsin to Wichita.

Unsurprisingly, the usual BDSM tropes that dominated the British equivalent of this map with 5 states most googled kink being masochism. But there were also a few contenders right out of leftfield. Without wanting to kink-shame, I’ve gotta ask what’s up in Nevada – hot, sweaty Nevada. Their most Googled kink happens to be armpits, which is fine and all, but I still have questions – the heat? The friction?! Surely bagpiping would be a more apt kink for the Northern states?

Shout out to Texas too, who, true to their cowboy roots, kept it traditional and stuck to the theme of whipping as their preferred ‘me time’ viewing.

Party Tricks Galore in Philadelphia…

One kink which I’m not all that familiar with led me to an interesting internet search (friends, please delete my history if I happen to die unexpectedly). Balloons. People from Philadelphia and Virginia in particular seem to be losing their shit to balloons. Naturally, I had to see what all the fuss was about – and believe me, I was pretty surprised by what I found. Having clicked on the first returned video from my search, I was drawn into watching a 12-minute long video of a stereotypically beautiful porn star dry-humping a humanoid sized inflatable dolphin. Each thrust was accompanied by a delightful squeak (from the dolphin), and a moan from the actress. It’s entertaining, for sure, but not for me. But hey, you do you PA and VA.

The Results Were a Shock, for Some.

Overall, you’d imagine there would be a repetitive theme that ran throughout, maybe with BDSM being the go-to for most, but instead I was pleased to see a diverse range of kinks featured on the map. Idaho, considered by many to be a bit of an overlooked state, proves itself more energetic than we may have thought with ‘erotic electro-stimulation’ as a popular pastime for its residents. The fairly obscure ‘hair fetish’ even makes an appearance as a favourite in Georgia.

Sports gear was unexpectedly common as a kink too, which is great because, ya know, its HOT! In fact, it turns out it’s nearly as popular as the ever-present group sex and masochism. This author is pleased that he’s not alone – there are millions of us! (or maybe a dozen incredibly horny enthusiasts)

Overall, it’s just satisfying to see that a broader range of kinks are becoming normalised. People are exploring their preferences and their limits to an extent that humanity has never seen before. What’s more is that it’s becoming a more comfortable and regular experience discussing these sexual quirks at an interpersonal level, whether it’s online or in person. The same could not have been said as recently as a decade ago. So, here’s to a diverse sexual palette, living life to the fullest, and discovering what’s out there in a safe and respectful way. N.B: remember to regularly delete your search history.

Written exclusively for Female Fetish Federation

2 responses to “Kinky Cartography; a State by State Breakdown of American Fetishes.”

  1. It’s not actually weird at all, and pretty beneficial for both partners in a straight relationship. It’s an egg that’s worn inside the vagina. Keeps the muscles tight, and…. STRONGER ORGASMS!

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