My story of how I was collared by a wonderful Mistress, but life commitments saw our heartbreaking end. I still remain yearning to belong.


Have you ever gone through life wondering where it is you fit in and belong? Well I know I have. When you’re a submissive person in life and not in the Fetish world, it’s tough. I’ve found people fully take advantage of my kind nature and willingness to please.

I’ve been in and out of submissive/Dominant relationships for most of my life and all I seem to get is hurt from it. I put in my heart and soul into it all but why can’t I seem to get things right? Is something the matter with the Dominant or me?

My last Mistress was a beautiful Woman, who cared for, loved me and made me safe. I was her property and all processions and money were given over to her, as she said ‘all you need to do is DO and not think and don’t worry’. She will care for me and all she asked for in-return was for me to care for her, be her property, do not answer back,. Everything she did was only in my best interests.

At first I found this to be one of the hardest things EVER! After 1 week, I gave over everything including my heart. She honoured her word and I didn’t have to worry about nothing and I done everything he asked and eventually before he even asked it was done.

She gave me my first ever experience of this type of relationship and she will always be my first ever Mistress who taught me everything I know to this day.

Submissive male in bondage

Unfortunately due to the stress of her running her own business, and me being involved in it, it took a toll on Domme/sub relationship. She took it that she would have to let me go and remove my collar that was all custom made for me.

I remember that day even now and seeing her sadness and regrets of having to do it. But like she said ‘ if I didn’t have the business then we could continue but this is the right decision for you and me. I will always love you Little Boy Blu. You came to me with those beautiful blue eyes but I know you will be ok’. She removed my collar, gave me my bags and I left.

I cried all the way back home and cried for days after. She told me not to contact him as it wouldn’t help us either, and as I have been told I did so.

To this day, 5 years later I haven’t spoken to her but if she is reading this then:

‘Mistress, thank you for teaching me how boys should be and what they should do. I now yearn for what you gave me and I can’t find it. With my heart and soul Mistress, you always have that handprint you have left on my heart. Thank you for all those happy memories and everything you invested into me, Ich have die liebe!’

Written exclusively for Female Fetish Federation

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.